Radical Edward's Amazing Good Cook Brother!
by Lemon Tea and Clocks
Summary: Cowboy Bebop/Harry Potter : In the year 2071 there are cowboy bounty hunters , thieves, hackers, dogs and grumpy ex-intra solar system policemen. The year 2071 is getting a new arrival, a wizard. If only Harry knew it himself.
1. Prologue

I'm insane. Why in the world am I doing this? This is insane.

Disclaimer: Rights to Cowboy Bebop and Harry Pooootter are not mine. They respectively belong to Sunrise and J.K Rowling. No sue-age pwease I only have a computer...and a cat.

This story probably won't make much sense unless you've watched Cowboy Bebop but I'll explain anyways. It's the year 2071 and humans live in space. This is because the 'Gate Accident' blew a chunk out of the moon and now moon rock showers occur regularly on Earth. The story revolves around Bebop and bounty hunter ship. On the ship are Spike Spiegel, Jet, Faye Valentine, Edward and Ein the dog.

No pairings yet....suggestions welcome...

* * *

**Radical Edward ****Wong ****Hau Pepelu Tivrusky the Fourth's Amazing ****Good-Cook brother!**

"Police! This is the police! Open up!"

Edward looked up from her laptop at the currently getting abused door. As she peered outside into the night she saw, a police space craft and two policemen trying to break down their amazingly awesome door. So she picked up her PC and bounced over the amazingly clean floor of their shack towards the kitchen.

"Nii-chan! Bro-bro, Ri-ri!" Edward said, gleefully to the tall 16 year old that was currently cutting potatoes for their dinner. When he didn't answer, engrossed in cutting potato, she pouted and started climbing up his frame and hugging his shoulders.

"Yes, Ed?" Ri-ri said, amused at her antics (when did she start using that nickname anyways?) "You didn't erase the police's files and replace them with porn again did you?"

"No-o Ri-ri! Edward won't do that again, because Ri-ri almost lost his job!" She pouted at Ri-ri for thinking she would do such a thing again. Ri-ri just sighed; Ed got into way too much trouble. He turned his very green eyes towards Edward, curious as to what had happened.

"It's just that some people are at the door, nothing bad!" Edward said.

'Nothing bad,' Ri-ri thought, sceptically 'Sure-e because you don't get in trouble with people at all for being a hacker,' but put the potato and his knife down anyways. He walked out of the kitchen with Ed riding on his shoulder just in time to see the door burst inwards and two policemen tumble on the nice clean floor.

"Ed, I thought it was nothing bad," Ri-ri said quirking an eyebrow at the policemen who were trying to get up off the floor.

"Policemen aren't always bad Ri-ri! You taught me that, sometimes they're just trying to do their job, right?" Edward said. Ri-ri winced, he had taught her that after Edward started to call the police evil and play 'heroes and villains' with them.

"Stop right there Radical Edward!" It seemed that the policemen had finally gotten out of their heap. The quite large policeman with a balding head was pointing his gun at him.

"You're under arrest! For hacking and-," He looked at Edward, "Kidnapping of children!"

'What? Wait a minute; he thinks **I'm** Radical Edward?' Ri-ri thought.

"I'm not Radical Edward!" Ri-ri said "In fact-"

"A likely story!" The other policeman joined in, "Were going to have to take you in, so just come quietly to our space..," He looked outside but their police space craft wasn't there, his mouth dropped open. Said space craft was flying in loop-d-loops in the air. Edward was using her hacking skills and a controller to control the space craft and making 'ohhh' and 'ahhh' noises as well.

"It's Edward that can hack just about anything" Ri-ri said, pointing down to Edward, "And by the way, my name's Harry"

"Boom!" Edward said, as she crashed the policemen's space ship into a small hill.

---Edward-----Wong---Hua---Pepela----Tivrusky---IV's-------Brother---------------------------------------

Stop. Rewind. Play.

Despite the police's opinions, I'm not Radical Edward. My name is Harry, at least I think it is, and I wasn't always Edward's brother, which is probably easily noticeable. My dark and long-enough-to-tie-back hair and green eyes against Edward's rag-tag red hair and eccentric personality we're just about night and day.

In fact, Edward found me.

* * *

Sooooo.....how about that? My insane idea. Pretty insane. Nyannn.

Review or don't....say hi or mi or ti...

Next chapter starting off at the actually beginning, hahaha.....


	2. Chapter 1

Insane insane insane ideas~ I still can't believe I'm writing this abomination.

Ohh! I don't like the 'special people come to Hogwarts,' Harry Potter cliché so uh, Cowboy Bebop baby!

Thanks people! I woke up one morning and my inbox was full and I think my brain explodicated. (I can't count very high in the morning.)

Disclaimer: No sue-age pwease! Me am good evul person yes? Sunrise and J.K Rowling you have my awe!

* * *

Floating.

Weird.

Why can't I feel anything?

What happened?

Voldemort...graveyard...light...

Sleepy.

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"We're going on a treasure hunt, treasure hunt, treasure hunt; we're going on a treasure hunt la-la dum!"

Edward was crawling close to the ground, goggles on, PC in one hand and weird metal spoon-like-thing in the other. The sky was blue and the earth below was dusty, sandy empty wasteland. The sun was high in the sky and it was about noon.

"This will be called Ed's amazing adventure! Searching for buried treasure underneath the earth!" Ed said happily, skittering across the dusty sand hills. The earth around her was littered with craters from the meteors that came from the moon. All of the Earth was the same, a vast wasteland full of dust, dirt and abandoned buildings. The human race left on Earth had long ago gone underground to escape the meteors.

"Wow, Radical Edward that is the most amazing gem I've seen, ever!" Ed said, pretending to be an imaginary person with a high pitched voice. She then bounced her way up a large sand hill.

"No, no it was nothing lady-person! In fact next time I shall bring an even more magnificent gem!" Edward told the imaginary person, putting on a deep voice and striking a pose on top of a dusty hill.

"Whoa!"

The dusty sand mound moved suddenly then collapsed and Edward was thrown off. She tumbled and rolled into a heap.

"Aww... Now my shirt and my shorts are all dusty!" She said, looking at her dusty white tank top and her dusty bike shorts. She then looked at the cause of her dusty-ness.

A purple crystal was sticking out of the sand where the mound used to be. The crystal was a stark contrast to the sandy desert and was large. It seemed to be deeply implanted in the earth and only the tip of the crystal was visible.

"Woo...Shiny, hehehe" Edward said, peering at the crystal; she then waved her metal spoon-thing at it.

'Beep Beep! Beep Beep!'

The spoon-thing went crazy. She turned on her PC and peered through her goggles at it. Underneath the sand there was more to the crystal. She zoomed out.

There was a gigantic diamond underneath her feet!

"Yay! Edward's gonna be rich! The famous crystal hunter Edward!" Edward laid her PC and spoon-thing down on a near-by rock and started digging around the crystal.

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The sun was low in the sky and the wind was wafting gently over the dusty plain.

Ed was worn out, so she slumped against a part of the purple crystal she had dug out. She had only managed to dig out most of the top of the crystal but that had taken ages.

"Sleep time! Ed says sleep, sleepies" Ed yawned and curled up next to the crystal. With a thought she reached out with her long arm and grabbed her PC, holding it like a teddy bear.

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"Yee-Haw! This is just like the good old days, boys!" An old man said. Said old man was riding in the back of an old truck.

"I remember when I used to drive these back and forth on the farm!"

"We know, we were there," The other two old men replied, from the front of the truck.

"Well, I don't remember that!" The old man from the back grouched. The old truck suddenly swerved in and out of some meteor holes so the old man in the back had to hold on tight.

Then something caught his eye. Two things, something shiny, glinting and...Purple, the other seemed to be a...

"Carlos! Stop the truck!" Shouted the old man in the back, to Carlos, the old man that was driving.

"What?" Carlos replied.

"Stop!" The old man in the back said and then he pointed at something in the distance.

The truck stopped. So abruptly it caused the old man in the back to fall off.

"Now what was it Antonio?" Carlos asked as the two old men got out of the truck normally. From his heap on the ground Antonio pointed.

"Over there isn't that a person next to the shiny thing?" He said, "Can't you see it?"

"I may be deaf but I'm not blind! Of course I can see it," Carlos said, looking frantically at the scenery, "There they are!"

"Let's go rescue a person, Jobim!" Carlos said to other old man, Jobim, "It'll be just like old times, eh?"

The two old men hurried to the person, leaving the other one still in a heap.

"Gah! Some friends they are!" Antonio said, after getting up and rushing after them.

The three old men made it over to the person and Jobim started to check their pulse.

"Are they still alive, Jobim?" Carlos asked, looking concerned.

"Yes, but I wonder what they're doing so far out here anyways?" Jobim said, the person twitched sporadically and they looked at each other.

"Look at this, guys!" Antonio shouted from behind the person, "It's gigantic!"

They scurried around to where Antonio was standing. The person had been sleeping against a big purple crystal!

The three old men looked at each other with the same thought going through their heads.

"This will be easy! I used to be a top hole digger years ago!" Carlos declared.

"We were there too, you know?" The other two replied.

-------------------- ------------------------------------ ------------------------- ----------------------- --------- ------------------------- --------------------------- -

The three old men were worn out.

"I think-" Huff, puff, "That person-" Huff, puff, "Had the, right idea," Said one of them, looking at the slumbering person on the other side of the crystal.

The crystal was strangely lop-sided as they had dug on the opposite side to where the person(Ed) was sleeping. It was now a third of the way out of the ground and almost as big as a child. While the old men were working they kept seeing glimpses of movement from inside the crystal.

"I think," Said one pausing to breathe, "We should take a break," So the three old men stumbled to the side of the hole, collapsed and conked out.

Unnoticed by the sleeping people, a rain of bubbles floated slowly to the top of the crystal. The sand started to be swept away by unnoticeable winds and the crystal was being slowly and magically uncovered.

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"Bwuah?" Edward sat up and rubbed her eyes. "Where is Ed?"

She turned around and saw the purple crystal.

"Good morning, money!" She said, turning around and hugging the crystal. "Have you grown bigger, money?" She pressed her face against it, curious and stared at its purple depths. From the depths she saw a bubble coming closer, so she pressed her face closer. It came closer and closer until, pop! It burst right in front of her nose.

Then Ed saw something strange. Inside the crystal she saw a flesh-coloured thing, partially obscured by all the bubbles rising to the top of the crystal.

The crystal pulsed. It pulsed bright, purple lights and was almost like a heartbeat.

It shattered. Like a thousand tinkling pieces of glass the front of the crystal shattered outwards. It rained crystal shards. Ed was blown backwards and tumbled head-over heels to the edge of the hole. The sound even woke the old men up from their sleep.

The four people in the hole looked at the crystal in amazement.

Inside the crystal, was a floating person. The person was curled up, asleep. Their long, dark hair obscured their features. Slowly, they started to uncurl. It was a boy and he was naked.

"Mon-ey?" Ed said, stumbling over her words in shock.

"What happened?" Antonio asked.

"What's with the light show?" Carlos asked.

"That crystal isn't gonna be worth anything now, is it?" Jobim asked.

The boy's feet slowly touched the ground. His eyes opened for a second, revealing an ocean of dark green.

Then he fell to the ground.

* * *

So that was it. The first time Ed and Harry meet.

I amazed I can write a 1,458 word chapter but I can't even write a 1,100 word essay. School.

Oh by the way have I told you this is my first story? I'm all nooblet and stuff at this. Tee hee.

tea


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I have no-o mone-y so yeah. Sunrise and J.K Rowling! (Waves banner). Money!

* * *

He was being poked. Then he was being tickled. Then there was a faint feeling of being stabbed with something sharp and pointy.

"Ow,"

He opened his eyes. Next to his face was a red blur. His side throbbed. He made to grasp it, but felt too drained and lethargic to even lift his arm. At the edge of his vision he saw that he was wearing an old white shirt and some worn jeans. They felt a tad too big for him.

He lost focus and looked up at the sky. He knew he should be panicking (and annoyed someone had stabbed him to get him to wake up) but everything was so muddled.

The sky was a big blue blur to him.

There was a cloud in the blur. And then another, a big one that looked like a dog. He could actually make out details!

The sky seemed to be moving, or perhaps was he moving? He looked back down at what was supposedly, the red blur.

The blur was actually a kid. A kid with spiky, messy red hair and was wearing goggles. She seemed to have a computer on her lap and was typing in a fast and jerky fashion. He thought she looked like one of the people that played on those musical instruments. Was it a piano or something? Organ? Anyways, she typed with dramatic sweeps, next to rounds of small tit-tat-tit-tats.

He turned his head to look and saw there was another person in the back of the truck. The other person turned out to be an old man that was sleeping with a straw hat on his face against the edge of the truck.

He was about to ask where he was, when the tit-tattering stopped. He looked back at the kid. The kid was staring angrily at her screen through the goggles.

"No, no, no, no, no-o!" She cried at the keyboard, "No-no, no, no, no-o-o!"

She fell backwards and kicked her legs angrily in the air and started banging her fists on the truck's floor.

'Eh?' He thought. The kid didn't look like they would stop soon.

"What's wrong?" He asked to her feet.

"The no-no's! No, no, no-answers!" She cried, accentuating each no with a kick of her legs. She finished it by stomping her feet and hands on the truck floor at the same time.

"Would ya please quiet down back there kiddies!" A voice shouted from the front of the truck. He looked over and saw that two more old men were in the front of the truck driving it.

"What question are you trying to answer?" He asked the girl. She immediately perked up and sat up straight, looking at him.

"Who are you?"

'Who am I? Did she not notice I was there? Or is she asking my name?' He thought

"My name?" He asked her.

"Yup!" She threw her arms up dramatically, "I can't find you using the internet at all!"

He was confused, he vaguely remembered someone talking about internet but that was just sending messages to other people.

"My name is..." He wasn't too sure, actually.

'_I'm Harry, Harry –' _

"Harry?"

"Ha-a-ry" She said, drawing out the word, she started typing on the keyboard again."Harry, Harry, Ha-ra-ri!"

"Where am I, anyways?" He asked her.

"Milky Way galaxy!" Click "Earth!" Clack "South America," Click "On a tru-uck."

'South America?' Harry felt like his mind was muddled. That was a long way from where he was before wasn't it? How in the world did I get here? Harry felt very confused.

"What's the date today? What day is it?" Harry asked. His brain was turning in tiny circles trying to get over the fact that he didn't exactly know where he was, or how he'd gotten here.

"The day is..." She stopped typing to think, "Wednesday and it is the 3rd of November, 2068!"

"What?" Why did that number sound so wrong? What was he forgetting? Harry clutched his head, trying to remember whatever the hell he was forgetting.

"Found you!" She said happily, "But it's old. Ed can hardly read it!" She then started typing again, this time making weird motions with her hands. It looked like she was doing some sort of jiggly dance.

Harry's brain had exploded from being overworked and he temporarily spaced out.

"Harry James..." She started, Harry immediately perked up, "Lily...Evans..." She seemed to be getting frustrated, "James...Erthe...No...What?"

"Gah! No-ooooo!" She started another tantrum, "How can this be-e? How, how, how! Who are you!"

Harry had snapped out of his stupor and looked confused at what had started her tantrum again.

"I think, I'm Harry," He said, "Who are you anyways? And do you know how I got here?"

She stopped tantrum'ing. She sat up with her back straight and looked him in the eyes.

"I am Radical Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky the Fourth, at your service Mr. Harry-person!" She said with a mock salute and bow. "And I, on a great adventure, just happened to find this big crystal-thingy and it was-"

* * *

"Okay kiddos, this is as far as we can take ya," Shouted one of the old men, as the truck stopped.

"And don't worry about the clothes," Said another old man, poking his head out of the window, "They outweigh the cost of this little bugger," He held up a small purple crystal shard, presumably from his crystal.

"Thanks," Harry said to the old men.

Harry was in shock as he followed Edward off the truck. Edward jumped and waved to the old men as they sped off. His mind was rolling over what Edward had just told him. A giant crystal? Sand? 2068? Who was he? How had he gotten here?

He was totally confused. But that seemed to be becoming a common occurrence for him.

Harry followed Edward as she wound her way towards an underground entrance. The surrounding area was dusty and dry; the only thing that stood out was the steel shelter-like entrance. Together they walked (or bounced) down the steps as the tunnel steadily got darker around them.

"So where is this leading to Edward?" He asked. She turned towards him with a confused look, and then smiled.

"You'll see!" She said and started to race down the steps, with a thought she turned around again, "You may call Radical Ed, Ed if you wish Harry-person," She started to zoom back down the steps again, leaving Harry in a trail of darkness.

"Hey! Wait Ed," Harry shouted, stumbling to follow her. He didn't even have a clue where he was! He took one last glance towards the fading surface light. With a sigh, he started down the steps again after Ed, trying not to fall and break his neck in the process.

* * *

"At least give me some warning next time you leave me on a long, dark, staircase, Ed!" Harry cried at the bubbly red-haired menace. She just smiled and started twirling and humming to herself. Then he saw what was behind her.

A giant underground town lay sprawled behind her. The entire cavern was dug out and had bright light embedded in the rock. The houses were a tan colour, from the colour of the rock they were made out of. People were hustling about and there were markets along the street side. He noticed that everyone was wearing something different and the bright colours made everyone mix together.

"Whoa!" He breathed, "Where are we?"

"The largest and deepest underground city on earth!" Ed chirped, before Harry could ask any other questions she walked off. She danced and jiggled in and out of the crowd with her laptop on her head. Harry just sighed and followed her. It's not like he knew anywhere well enough to go off on his own.

* * *

Walking in an entirely new city was stressful. Following Ed was extremely stressful. Following Ed around, in a city that's new to you is downright impossible.

Harry could have sworn he'd lost her about ten times. One minute she was there, the next minute there was an empty space. He was then left to wander the dusty streets, with absolutely no clue where he was going. Then she would be back again, a fluff of red hair bobbing in and out of a brightly coloured crowd. Harry felt lucky she always turned up again; otherwise he would have been wandering the streets of the underground town forever.

Ed finally stopped at an archway to a shop. The sign was in a foreign language that just seemed like a bunch of squiggles to Harry and the inside of the shop was dark.

"What's this?" He asked Ed, who was sniffing about at the entrance to the shop.

"Well there's a book person. He likes history way-way lots! Especially before the moon went boom," She said, while sniffing the place. She looked like a dog.

"You think he might have anything on me, Ed?" Harry asked, curious.

"Maybe," She looked thoughtful. Then she disappeared through the archway.

Harry followed after her, slightly hopeful.

* * *

Sorry about the late update! Tests, school and a trip to Hong Kong just broke my creative-ness.

I'm trying to make it seem like Harry only has ideas of vague things. I'm not too sure about my writing this time. I was thinking of scrapping and starting over but this way everything sorta lays out easily.

Not much exciting happens. But I'm getting there!

Thanks for all the reviews they really make my day.


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